im gay
i know
yea but for you.
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
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