He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
