He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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