I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
