I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
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