She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
so much tequila, so little girl.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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