I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize
