I need help removing her.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
