I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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