Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I don't deserve a penis
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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