It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
