kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize
