Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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