She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
