would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
