so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
