I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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