So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives�
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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