Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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