yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
