Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
