I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize