Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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