I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
