Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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