I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
