Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I am full of burrito and curiosity
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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