These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
