Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.�
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
