What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
