Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Randomize
