dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
