Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
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