Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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