Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
