what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
