I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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