I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Someone shattered a urinal.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Randomize
