Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
