No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
