I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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