What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Even my vagina gasped.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Randomize
