I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Randomize
