Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
be right there i have to get my cape
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
