THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
The struggles of a small town man whore
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Randomize
