If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I love you.
Bad choice
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
