i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
