we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
