I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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