Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
